March Madness Tryouts

Basketball Tryouts

Last year Xander’s told me that the basketball coach Mr. Lomax told him that he should try out for basketball. It was going to be too much of a hassle and I was worried about getting back from school late and him being school too long. Mind you this was second grade. Now, this is 3rd grade and he’s in the school after school program so I’m thinking now he can do all the things he wanted to do but we couldn’t last year…like Mad Science and Basketball.

So, I made plans for me and Chris to be there for basketball tryouts. Xander was acting so weird and was angry about something with me that I thought it was because we were sleep training and only he mumbled a response when I talked to him about the tryouts. I shrugged it off.

I packed a change of clothes and made plans to be there after school. I was excited and nervous. Chris even reminded me! And was going to be there. I got there early and went to the STARS program to get him and get him ready for the tryout.

Alex was not trying to hear it, he wanted to go home said he was, “mad that he ever said it” and “his stomach hurt” he was the saddest little boy. I slowly realized that he was nervous and scared. Some of his friends walked up to him and asked was he trying out. The look on his face was one I will never forget. “Like, damn it woman!” I realized that all of his friends were on the team. Well, some of them anyways. They did look like little mini Jordan’s and Shaq’s. Chris is not a basketball guy and my buying Space Jam the week before is not enough lol. But I knew he liked basketball. I told him it would be fun. He asked “could I just watch?” “yes, you can watch until it’s your turn,” He rolled his eyes. I told him his Dad was coming to see him. This irritated him and kinda set his resolve. He knew there was no getting around this. He gave up resisting.

I found the table to sign him up and he hid in the hallway. I asked him if he wanted to help me fill it out and he yelled at me “I’m not the one signing up for this! You are!” and ignored his yelling because he was right. So, I thought “touche” and signed his lil butt up with as much compassion as I could. I bought him a snack, with the change I had in the bottom of my purse. 4 quarters. He read a book throughout, I think as a stress relief. Played on my phone when we went back into the auditorium. They started getting them lined up. He went willing without me making him. He had on his Adidas track suit and T-shirt that said “ Train Hard Win Easy” butthe pants were going to make him hot. I had asked him to change, and he had refused, all the other boys had on shorts. I sat on my hands.

Chris came then, I was sitting in the bleachers willing myself not to run on the court and change his pants to shorts. Chris sat down and I gave him the rundown. We looked at the 3rd grade NBA all-star team that is the Skinner West 3rd grade “Stars” and shook our heads amazed at the globetrotting 8 year olds. And, Chris then jumped up greeted Xander with a playful shove.

Xander slowly got into it, they ran sprints, did dribble drills, did layups, they worked those lil boys. My lord. You could tell the difference of little boys who were on the team. Confident and skillful. It was something I wanted Xander to possess. But, I still resisted the urge to grab him up and run up out of there.

He did at one point allow me to give him some gatorade that I’d bought on points at Walgreens’ that morning, did i say that I’m broke. I sat in the stands and I vacillated between giving him thumbs ups, clapping and encouraging smiles and looks and from trying not to look at him too much and embarrass him, Chris or myself. I texted Terry and Kelly to distract myself. “ Your nephew is trying out for the basketball team” HELP ME! They were playing a full court game now and having the boys in teams taking turns. Xander was literally rolling on the floor as he waited his turn.

Chris had gone and come back from speaking to the other Father’s (R and Cameron) that we had met the previous Saturday at a home birthday party.

So, we when I felt a little tap on my knee when I was texting I was surprised to look up at the face of my son looking INTENTLY at me. “Mom, it’s my turn to play now” MY lordt he caught me sleepin’. So of course chagrined, I focused on my son as he raced back and forth, fouled boys, got the ball, was fouled, landed on his back and held on to it. Not fighting but working. I told him later at home, “I love how you were really into it and were working really hard.” He said “Mom, it’s called hustle.” WELL, I never!

As the game ended, the coach had all the boys gathered around he introduced them to the other coaches. The emotion in this room was ripe, I mean this was way more emotionally turbulent than the NBA. Really. They told them that they would be notified if they made the team on 9/19/2016. And I couldn’t hear it all, but I did hear him say that they were all a family and they ended in a group chant and high five. I sneaked a peek at all the other parents mainly fathers and it was amazing the amount of love in that room… you could almost touch it. Wistful and cottony soft. Smelled like adolescent spirit though, lol.

My kid walked over to me drenched in sweat, drank the rest of the gatorade and all of my water from my water bottle. He said “I was going to have to peel the shirt from his body” I changed him to his other shirt…still no shorts lol.

As we were walking to our cars and speaking to the other father’s Xander said “Mom, I think this calls for a celebration!” As serious and sober as a pastor.

SHIT YEAH!!!

I’m broke though, so I tell Chris and he says ok. He will figure it out. Harold’s Chicken wings for the kid. Boy, was he ever pleased and proud of himself. He knew he had accomplished something and was like “that shitz was hard as hell. But I did it, celebrate me”. Trying out is the hardest thing, it is the unknown, you are scared and doing it is the anyways is courageous. I was proud of him and of us all. But he knew — HE DID THAT.

I saw all kinds of faces play out on his face yesterday, Jay Jay, Kelly, Mike, Terry, Chris, Daddy and Mom. It was amazing oh and of course me.

I remember how hard these things were to do and I respect it. And I also understand how worthwhile and valuable they are too. So I prep, and plan and push as well as support and sit there and try not to run out of there.

My baby knows that his mom wants to see him and even if she isn’t watching at that MOMENT. He as the temerity to say “Hey mom! Look up, you don’t want to miss this!” I love him for that, that is him — all him, amazing. He knows that his mother loves him and would skip through fire juggling bottles of henny for him. He knows that without question and it is true. I love him more than the multi-verse!

My mom loved me and she made me do all kinds of stuff. I did have the personality that was a little too meek I think, I didn’t ask for things that I didn’t think my parents could get me or wouldn’t get me. I said no for them. Didn’t want to be a trouble, didn’t want to be a bother. LOL. They seemed to always be asking and making me do more and ask for more. I wished I had. I didn’t play sports, seemed like a hassle. I get it now.

So now to wait for the determination on if he made the team. He said, “I have to see if I made the team, mom” I told him that what matters was that he tried his best and I asked him if he did and he said yes. And I / we understand that is what matters and that the rest is up to God and Mr. Lomax. LOL

After we got home, after the wings and the homework. I noticed him typing on his computer. He showed me that he was using the notepad to type his DIARY!!! The first entry. My lord. I remember it like it was yesterday when first I started keeping a diary. And today he thought was worthy enough for his first entry. I know he will remember this day prolly for the rest of his life.

I showed him how to save the entry and was able to see a peek… it said…

“Today was basketball tryouts. It was fun. I decided to have a celebration. We had Chicken wings… They were yummy.”

I mean how can you NOT LOVE THIS kid. He is the best of me and the man I love mixed up to be way more than the sum of his parts.

I thank God to be able to be his mother.